A Work in Progress

In preparation for potentially, maybe, hopefully applying for and going to PA school, this year I'm going to be taking (and re-taking) some prerequisites.  I figure that that this is a necessary step,  a review for what I will actually need to retain now, and serve to ease me back into academic life. I had my first class today.  I've been joking that I can't wait to be the older adult student who screws up the curve for everyone.  Today, though, I realized that I (at 31) just might be the oldest person in the class.  I sought refuge by sitting next to who is probably the second oldest person in the class who just so happens to be working on getting into PA school.  So, I'll have to kill her. I am excited to take A&P again, after 10 years of secretly wanting to retake it because the material is so amazing, but so abundant that I definitely lost (or never had) much of it. The class was fine and basically nothing happened.  I remember loving the f...

Looking back in the blog, I see that I used to at least mention calls I'd been on that week/day/month.  Over time, I realized that all of this documentation could have gotten me in trouble. That, plus the novelty does wear off, even in a business like EMS. So, the call logs tapered off.  But, I also realize how many calls I've forgotten in recent years.  In fact, I've even forgotten the calls I've written about! So, here are a few that I remember.  Closed broken ankle- single step won.  Open broken ankle, driveway won (but it was for a a good cause).  Great old crack on the head that looked like a murder scene...he was fine! (More or less).  A guy had a seizure and fell onto something that busted a huge gash in his face.  Insult to injury (or the other way around).  A lady with restless leg syndrome.  Yes, this is totally a medical emergency (did you get the sarcasm?)  A guy who 'bumped' his head and felt like going to the hospit...

Yes, I'm one of those assholes.  The one that says "Well, I know college isn't for everyone." while secretly thinking, "Except for my kids.  Only idiots don't go to college." But the truth is, college isn't for everyone.  Countless non-idiots have made it their whole lives without going to college.  In fact, most people I know didn't go to college and they're doing just fine.  It's only weirdos like me who can't seem to get enough. And the thing is, college is no longer a golden ticket to a 'successful' life.  I recently ran into an old friend I knew in high school.  She went to college and majored in (what I would usually phrase as) something useless like...drama. I made that face.  That face that every asshole makes when someone tells me they majored in drama, or art, or dance.  That face that says "way to waste all of your money and four years of your life."  That face that says "How's working as a ...

Last week, I got to go to the EMS World conference in Nashville, TN.  More on Tennessee later.  But, like every time I have been to an EMS conference, I was left wishing I had my own ambulance service as well as absolutely unlimited funds.  I liked a lot of the things.  I wanted almost all of the things...except those that were totally absurd.  I am sure that my employer will hate that I went because I will only make safety oriented and expensive suggestions at budget time.  Some ideas I saw there filled me with a sense of urgency and the desire to completely change every ambulance I encounter.  I'll give you the top 5, not including the fake blood that actually clots. 1.  Lifts This thing may look really silly.  But, I believe that it fills a huge void in our care.  We've all been on those calls when an old or overweight or frail person has fallen out of or off of or just fell and can't get up.  Classic, right?  Here's my ...

Last week I stayed up until midnight, on a day when I really didn't want to, in order to register for spring classes.  I have a vague memory of the first time I went to community college of waiting in line and hoping that the class you wanted and fit perfectly into your schedule would be open.  Now, I just have to remember a password (or let google remember it for me) and register in the comfort of my living room.  I am probably wearing the same outfit. I've been taking medical terminology online.  This is my first and hopefully last foray into online class-taking.  From the beginning I felt very old.  It took me way too long to figure out how to get to the class, find assignments, and just figure out what the hell was going on.  Oh, my I felt old.  I did figure it out and I am just going to assume that every student in an online class is cheating.  Basically, especially in a class based on memorization, everything is open book. Once I f...

The trouble with this plan is that it has so many fail points that I am afraid to advertise it.  It is also a very long-game type of plan (at least four years to completion).  I also don't want to build it up too much because I think I did for my parents whom almost deemed it not wild-ass enough.  Though I'm sure left to come up with one, had me feeding penguins in the Antarctic, or taking a trip to the international space station. Basically this plan has me going back to school.  Shocking, I know.  Firstly, going back to my good old community college to take (and retake) prerequisites.  Retake because my Anatomy and Physiology classes were over 10 years ago.  How did that happen?  And we've arrived already to the first of many fail points.  I need to take five prerequisites and maintain basically straight A's.  This includes microbiology and organic/biochemistry.  I barely made it through basic chemistry, so I am justifiably worr...

I just finished brushing my teeth when I heard a weird noise down the hall in my bedroom.  Noises themselves are not unusual, bedtime is a typical period for the cats to decide to run amock around the house.  But there was something about this noise.  Ready to yell at the cats, I peeked in my room to see a bat, alive and well, on the floor surrounded by two curious cats.  "Oh, **** there's a bat in here." was all I had to say as I did an immediate aboutface and went dowstairs.  Now, I am no stranger to domestic crises, but this was different.  Realizing that this bat was now between myself and my phone, and on the floor, I grabbed a sheet and bravely headed back upstairs.  But the bat, being a winged creature, afterall, had regained altitude and was now clinging to the wall somewhere where my cats could see it, but I could not.  They were beside themselves, presented with a moving, alive toy, I could barely get their attention.  Before I m...

There's been some of discussion lately around work about wearing shorts on scenes in the summer.  Some providers argue that 'if they are truly sick, patients won't care what I look like when I show up.'  But let's be honest, how many patients are truly sick?  Sick enough to not look at you with even a slightly critical eye.  Let's not forget that our patients are rarely alone, accompanied by friends, family members, or staff of a medical facility.  They can see us to. Our immediate appearance must build trust with them as well.  When you walk into the home of someone whom called for your help, everything matters.  They are the ones about to put their lives ino the hands of strangers.  Appearing professional can come down to having your boots tied and your shirt tucked in.  No, these things do not directly affect patient care.  But, they do affect how your patients respond to you.  Trust must be built from the first moment you walk...

When I was a kid, I wanted to be a paramedic.  Almost every year in my school books I said I wanted to be a firefighter, EMT, or paramedic. The evolution was easy.  Once I realized that I was afraid of things that were on fire, paramedic was it.  There is little I am more passionate about than a good education.  "Think education is expensive? Try ignorance."  As those elitist say. I went to college, followed the path I was 'supposed to', and no one ever talked about money.  How much money will you make in your career of choice?  Everyone knows the careers that would technically make a lot of money, and it's all but guaranteed that without a college education you will have no hope (so the guidance counselors would have you believe).  Equally passionate about education, my parents saved and scrimped to send me to college.  Other paramedic students have long term loans, crippling debt, or second mortgages.  No matter how they arri...

It was a necklace.  A necklace of tiny plastic purple beads. Yes, those are definitely tiny plastic purple beads, or maybe not.  Is that a sex toy?  No, that is more ridiculous than a necklace.  Well, then I guess it's an alien.  I've entered the twilight zone and I am about to witness an alien birth.  I'm not sure. I mean it's late and my first time but there was definitely something weird there, something weird coming out of this woman's vagina. I composed my 3 am brain, willing out to figure out just what was happening.  She was in labor, at her due date, and assured me that everything was normal.  This may have been my first time, but it was not hers.  They just waited a little too long, that was all. And I was stoked, so excited to get a classic delivery.  A delivery that should go fast and smooth.  I am one of the few paramedics who want to deliver a baby.  We're 15 minutes out and she's ready to push.  This is goi...

This lovely orchid plant was my grandmothers, who kept the finicky plant alive for several years. It is now under my care...I give it a week. This, more importantly, as the title implies, is my 1000th post here on the old blog. Wow! This is also the 248th photo of the day, counting from May of 2008 plus a bonus month of October 2009 .  I don't have much to say on this occasion, it seems crazy that I've made so many posts.  Granted, a certain percentage of them are complete nonesense, but they still count. It's funny to read those really old posts.  Some of them make me wonder just who was writing.  It's amazing to have a record of personal and professional changes one can go through in nine years.  My life in 1000 posts.  I do realize there are fewer and fewer posts about EMS.  Certainly there were a lot back in 2006-7.  But that was when it was new.  When I wanted to share every tiny thing I went on.  And I'm not saying I'm ja...

I started this post back in last summer. I finally dreamed up the last couple while cleaning out my drafts. I'm cleaning out my draft posts because I am nearing a blogger milestone, so I want to be perfectly clear how many posts I have. Yes, I acknowledge that at least 30 per year for the last 6 years were basically cheating (the photo a day project) But...they count as posts. Anyway. Apparently I was feeling pumped about life and wondering what I might have told my 15 year old self. Here are a few things I've learned in 30 years...at least the things that look good on paper. As I turn 30, I must say I'm feeling pretty good.  29 had a much more palpable and depressive effect on me.  But this year, I've had such an action packed birthday week, that I haven't had time to contemplate too deeply turning 30.  I've wanted to be an adult my whole life, so I don't really mind.  That and I get to say things like "I've seen Toy Story way too many tim...

Remember micro machines?

the all important gloucometer checks.

Okay, a lot of water fowl these last few days.

I'm not sure what's going on here, but these geese were escorting over 30 goslings!