So, I'm afraid of bats.

I just finished brushing my teeth when I heard a weird noise down the hall in my bedroom.  Noises themselves are not unusual, bedtime is a typical period for the cats to decide to run amock around the house.  But there was something about this noise.  Ready to yell at the cats, I peeked in my room to see a bat, alive and well, on the floor surrounded by two curious cats.  "Oh, **** there's a bat in here." was all I had to say as I did an immediate aboutface and went dowstairs. 
Now, I am no stranger to domestic crises, but this was different.  Realizing that this bat was now between myself and my phone, and on the floor, I grabbed a sheet and bravely headed back upstairs.  But the bat, being a winged creature, afterall, had regained altitude and was now clinging to the wall somewhere where my cats could see it, but I could not.  They were beside themselves, presented with a moving, alive toy, I could barely get their attention.  Before I made my attempt to 'get' the bat or whatever the hell I thought I was going to do, I did grab my recently liberated phone and called the boyfriend.  I crept toward the bat with the phone propped on my shoulder, sheet between my hands when suddenly the bat remembered again that it was a winged creature and it flew toward me.  I also grew wings, dropped all of my armor and flew down the stairs screaming in a most unlady-like fashion.  Leaving the boyfriend perplexed and amused, I am sure. 
Somehow I managed to lure the cats away and into the bathroom with treats and promises.  I opened the front door, and 'Bruce Wayne' was at it again circling the hallway, sneaking down the stairs, then he might have detoured but I'm not sure as I was running all the way into the street.  I watched as it found it's way out of the door, though I was far from declaring the house safe.  Flashlight in hand, I inspected every nook and cranny before being able to go to sleep.  A ritual I kept up for the next week.  I worry that now that security as relaxed, I may meet Bruce again.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Just worrying--but you do know that bats can carry rabies--so keep up the security.

Anne
Unknown said…
absolutely hilarious!!! to conquer fear, you must become fear! *insert theme music here*

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