What hole?

Okay so, I was fording a river on an Austrailian outback expedition and Half Pint and I took on a bit too much water.  We were being chased by angry dingos at the time, so there was a bit of a rush to get back on the road.  The engine was running fine, of course, but I had to use an outback technique and shoot a hole in my floorboard so that the water would quickly drain out and we could continue to make our daring getaway.  Luckily, we next went by a winery who sold novelty sized bottles of wine so I was able to negotiate an extra large cork from them to fill the bullet hole.  We had time to stop there, as dingos are famous for their dislike of wine.  We sought refuge in that winery for several months, in fact, and I have become a vintner and can speak perfect Austrailian.  I digress. 
I've been considering fixing the hole, but I'd really rather keep it as a reminder of our great adventure.  I still have the extra large cork anyway.

I am a huge fan of "I Love Lucy."  In one episode, through a series of very silly events, Lucy and Ethel found themselves changing a tire while a potential serial killer was asleep in the back seat.  They bravely found the jack and the spare and believed they were making real progress.  That was, until the top of the jack started to protrude through the front fender.  Horrified, they abandoned their attempt and I don't remember what happened, but they weren't murdered and the moral of the story was to never lie to your husband about losing train tickets.  Or something like that.  

After checking the oil level in the mini (Half Pint) and finding it to be looking quite dirty, I got a little over ambitious and decided to change the oil by myself.  Armed with the Haynes guide, a bunch of appropriate oil, brand new jack stands and a bottle jack, I got to it.  Things seemed to be going pretty well.  I figured out how to make the jack work, and had found what I thought was the right place to put it under the car.  Low and behold, it was lifting the car.  Result!  My celebrations ended abruptly though, when the car returned back to earth as the jack punched a perfectly round hole through the floorboard.  Turns out, I was completely wrong as to where to put the jack.  Absolutely horrified, I struggled to get the jack unstuck, covered the hole with the carpet, and packed up all my oil changing supplies. 

I don't really know why I'm relaying this story as it is quite embarrassing.  But, I knew you would like the story.  Please make fun of me.  I deserve it.