A Work in Progress

I’ve been giving some thought to an aspect of my life recently that I really should appreciate more. As a single woman with many married friends, I feel like I get to borrow husbands. There may be no way to introduce this topic without looking needy and weird, but in all sincerity, I am blessed to have married friends and husbands I can borrow who will take care of me. Without sounding like a polygamist, I have different (brother?) husbands who fix my car, chop wood, play video games, fix random stuff, and even a work husband who looks after me there. In a way it is sort of like borrowing other peoples’ kids and giving them back when they get cranky or smelly. It is a luxury in my life to have these men who work as worthy place holders for my future possible husband. Of course, they are spoiling me in a way that will make it more impossible to find an actual husband, but oh well. And of course, I can still kill my own spiders, change light bulbs, and trim trees, but it is nice w...

Okay so, I was fording a river on an Austrailian outback expedition and Half Pint and I took on a bit too much water.  We were being chased by angry dingos at the time, so there was a bit of a rush to get back on the road.  The engine was running fine, of course, but I had to use an outback technique and shoot a hole in my floorboard so that the water would quickly drain out and we could continue to make our daring getaway.  Luckily, we next went by a winery who sold novelty sized bottles of wine so I was able to negotiate an extra large cork from them to fill the bullet hole.  We had time to stop there, as dingos are famous for their dislike of wine.  We sought refuge in that winery for several months, in fact, and I have become a vintner and can speak perfect Austrailian.  I digress.  I've been considering fixing the hole, but I'd really rather keep it as a reminder of our great adventure.  I still have the extra large cork anyway. I am a hu...

Among the millions of things I've been meaning to do, I have been meaning to post about when my good friend came to visit from far away and we got to take a day trip starring the civil war and a classic mini cooper.  The mini is a perpetual scene stealer, though we learned that not everyone would like to have a picture of it (even when you accidentially/kind of knowingly drove in front of them while they're taking a picture)  We probably should have shouted 'You're welcome!' to the guy I made really mad, as his picture was probably much improved by having half pint in it.  The car brings sunshine and happiness where 'ere it goes (except for that one guy).  (Besides, everyone shoots in digital and he was taking a picture of a statue that wasn't going anwhere.  Okay, I'm finished feeling guilty.) Anyway, we drove out to Antietam national battlefield mere days before the 150th anniversary celebration.  Well, celebration is not right.  I'll just leav...

I am a week behind in the blogging once a week plan, but no one noticed probably. Moving on! This has been an exciting and unprecedented (pun intended) week. Last Tuesday I voted for all winners. Initially I was quite disappointed that my Tuesday improv class was still a go on election night. Therefore, to have an election party I would have to sacrifice class. Needless to say, I didn't have an election party. Well, I guess I did have quite a small one, after I got home, by myself whooping at the TV for a minute before going to bed. Not quite as good as the George Bush piñata from last time, but I'll take it for a good result. That was certainly the highlight of my two weeks, even trumping making my first pumpkin pie entirely from scratch. That was an amazing experience that took almost the entire day and most of my sanity. The result though, was scrumptious, I must say. So, I will tell you of my recent first foray into the world of roller coaster riding. My childh...

There are a few things that stereotypically define adulthood. One of those, other than drinking soda whenever you want is owning a home. Here you become responsible for 30 years of debt as well as maintaining what is really a big space with tons of working parts that no single person could understand. From roof to basement, front yard to back, a house is needy. Mine is 93, so sometimes it needs a little extra love as well as help across the street. Back in September, I had my first house guests of the year. Two separate parties coming within a week of each other. On the eve of the firsts arrival, I decided to double check on the guest room (which I hadn't seen in some time, keeping the door shut for temperature efficiency). I opened the door and found the most hellacious mess where part of the plaster ceiling had fallen in. In a most sitcomesque fashion, I shut the door immediately and sent up a little prayer. But, when I reopened the door, the mess was still there. Lite...

I bet that you thought I forgot to blog today. Well, I didn't.  I purposefully waited until 9pm so as to keep you guessing.  I have not neglected any social media today.  In fact, it is a momentous day as it is the day I added pics to facebook, wrote a blog post, and joined twitter.  I know, I know.  Don't give in to the man!  Twitter?  Isn't that yesterdays myspace?  Isn't that for aging actors to connect with the young folk?  Isn't that just another way for everyone to annoy all of their acquaintances with superfluous updates about their mundane lives?  Yes to all!  Well, mostly all.  I was inspired by an improv peep to get on over and tweet like a bird of some sort.  I am going to reserve my 140 characters for charming and amusing insights into my every day life.  I know no one cares, but having amassed a whopping 5 followers in my first 24 hours, I am inspired.  I will be publishing a book of my clever tweet...

Good Lord, it is October 17th.  This is a date of no personal significance, but it is important to note that I am blogging, and the last time that happened was September 2nd.  And I call myself a blogger!  The shame.  Anywho, to the things!  I'll stick to this past week, vow to make up for the last five by blogging every week until I am caught up on all of my nonsense news.  Yes, let's make it Wednesdays.  Deadlines!  Expectations! Motivation! Plus, having a weekly thing sets me up for weekly reflection and maybe I'll stop forgetting things.  I'm afraid this post is already too random, but I will promise more cohesion in future.  And maybe even a point.  Last week, some of the fam and I went to see Wicked to celebrate a couple of birthdays.  It is an awesome show.  I am not a fan of frou-frou musicals, but this one is great.  I've seen it three times now and it is magic.  Unfortunately, the songs have been ...

This job can sometimes wear on a person. The heart the soul, and the sleep schedule are all at risk. This is a job where I often find myself in a situation where I can be helpful, make a bit of a difference in someones day, and then get paid to nap: ideal. But sometimes, after a string of drunk, silly, completely healthy, poor decision making patients I can be sick of it all. When I feel this building up, it is usually disipated with a great call where I felt very useful and all of those doubtful feelings go away. Recently, feeling my job tolerance running low, we were flagged down by two boys. The concern and worry in their faces made my skepticism fly out the window. I hopped out and they both started relaying their experiences simulaneously. Kid 1: "There are these bunnies running around and we can't find their mom and we don't know how to catch them and they're going to be hit by a car or something and how will they eat and they're under the cars! C...

His wife managed to pull the car to a stop in the nearest yard. He had insisted on driving, though he wasn't feeling well. She let him, as it was her last bargaining chip to go to the hospital in the first place. But now that he was slumped over the wheel, it was up to her to get help. She called 911, and after trying to get him out of the car, she reluctantly took the dispatchers advice to leave him and run to a neighbor. She climbed the short hill to the house, shouting for help, when she was surprised by a little dog, unfriendly and defensive. It clamped down on her leg and refused to let go. Her cries for help were compounded now and her only comfort came in the distant whine of sirens. Relieved but still attempting to kick the dog off, she made her way back to her husband. The dog gave up, leaving blood running into her sock from an angry wound. Two EMT's grabbed her husband and layed him onto a stretcher. They started CPR and she couldn't watch. She was ...

I've been on an accidental hiatus.  From blogging, from biking, from caring, from life.  I don't know why.  That's the problem with these things. They sneak up on me and then suddenly I find myself on the couch for the 30th day in a row (I exaggerate, but only a bit).  This type of thing usually only happens in winter, the old SAD, but, for me, not even perfect summer days could lift my spirits. But, then things got better.  That's the solution with these things, happiness sneaks back in and plants itself right back into my little brain.  And now, every day, I feel like I am waking up from a long sickness.  I guess that's a good thing.   Sometimes I can't help but take on the problems of the world.  I can't help but find my job unfufilling, my life lonely, and television depressingly bad.  Then, I realize that I am trying so hard to find my inspiration, direction, and purpose that I am forgetting to live.  I know that sounds pain...

Top Gear advise never to meet your hero car.  Of course, they're talking about the Ferrari California, Butatti Veyrons and Pugani Zondas.  Despite their warning, I bought my hero car without even seeing it in person.  Here is my Top Gear style review. Just because it needed tons of bulbs, a new spare tire, lug nuts, new shocks, brake cylinders, ball joints, a front headlight, a radiator, and rear brakes, and just because it had a wobbly steering wheel, wing mirror, and muffler, and just because it has no air conditioning, radio, or automatic windows, and just because it has a few bumps and scratches, and a couple of rust spots doesn't mean that it isn't the most awesome car I've ever seen. Oh, and the interior light is falling out, and in a slight 40 year design flaw, the ignition coil is in the very front of the car, exposed to rain and susceptable to shorting. It is beautiful in its simplicity.  When a car is 10x5x4 it can't be complicated.   It has just a ...

To my friends with kids (and that's just about all of you now): I miss you.  I'm inexplicably proud of you and excited for all the positive changes in your lives. I haven't been there for you like I thought I would.  But life, in many forms, gets in the way.  I know we're on different planes of life now and it's selfish to ask; but don't forget me.  It scares me when I see us getting so far apart.  I know you often don't know what to do with me, and that's okay.  I don't know what to do with me either.  I don't want to lose touch for the next 18 years and then catch up when they leave for college.  I want to know your kids.  I want to be in their lives.  It's been an honor to see you all become parents and I want to be there to see you all become great ones.  Maybe one day, you can pass your wisdom on to me.  I want to see if they get your sense of humor, or your beauty, or your creativity, and I don't want to see it on faceb...

This afternoon on the way to work, I was tailgaited on the highway.  The kind where he was so close I couldn't even tell if he was flicking his lights at me, though I am sure he was.  I was already going 10mph over (which is plenty) and I was passing someone.  But, the more I could see him getting angry, and the closer he got to me, the longer I lingered in the fast lane.  Yes, this is dangerous, and playing into his hands, and lowering myself to his level, but if he thought for one second that tailgaiting me would get me to go faster, he was wrong, and I wanted him to know. I did eventually move, gave him the two finger salute, and was left in his dust, pondering how silly the whole thing was. It is people like that whom I would love to have a little chat with.  A chat about how one second can change your life, or, I'll say at the risk of being dramatic, take it. One second of inattentiveness, anger, aggression, and, yes, passive aggression can make all the ...

Back in August 2010, I had my most recently dental emergency, outlined in this post.   It turned out to be no big deal, and for about 75 bucks they cleaned, xray, and fixed my broken tooth.  They also filled another one.  It took less than two years for that filling to break and I had a similar panic when I realized it.  Feeling the hole in my tooth was shocking and concerning (and gross as it meant that I swallowed the filling).  I, of course, as a responsible adult, have put off finding a new dentist for almost two years.  After carrying my insurance card for six months in order to find a dentist, yesterday I couldn't find it.  So, I had to call work to get the name of the insurance company.  Then call the insurance company, get my numbers, then find a dentist.  This sounds easy, but when faced with a list of faceless dentists, how does one choose?  Luckily, my sisters dentist was on the list and I am now left to wait with my holy to...

There are two situations in which you can see me acting a fool.  1.  improv class  2.  in the presence of insects. I went up to my attic this evening, I forget the reason now, as when I got there, I discovered a small but growing bees nest in the corner of the old skylight.  Cue my first panic dance.  I took stock.  The window opens, reluctantly, when you push on the end in which they are currently habitating.  My attic has dressses, luggage, skis and a bow and arrows. It wasn't until I was attempting to push the window open with a ski pole and shoo the bees out with an arrow that I remembered that I had some bee spray in the kitchen.  Forget about it!  This will totally work!  I reiterated to myself.  I got the window open and attempt to push the hive out of it when it broke off and just fell on the floor.  Cue the panic dance and run away shouting.  I abandoned my weapons and ran downstairs to retrieve the spray...

Back in October I eluded to a 'new' 'commuter car' that never came to fruition.  Some of you may know that I have lusted after a classic mini cooper for some time now.  I have spent years trolling ebay and minimania.com looking for one in a reasonable radius at a reasonable price.  I stumbled upon one very near to my house and almost bought it.  That was, until it was hit by a state snow plow. So, the search continued.  A passive hobby, every once in a while scanning the sites until one popped up in Rhode Island.  That's not too far, and after my years of research, I know what the going rate is, and this one was cheap.  So, sight unseen (save some bad pictures) I decided to buy it. Last week I drove up there, and before I knew it I was sitting in the most adorable car ever produced by man.  I was very happy to see that it did in fact exist, was drivable, and that the seller was really selling it and not planning to murder me at all.  Every...

I know that all three of you will be relieved to see that I've all but sorted out the picture of the day project for this year.  What a relief!  But the most astute of you will see that I still owe you a day for the 30th of May.  All I did that day was drive, have a meltdown with the mini, and go to sleep.  Trust me, it wasn't that interesting.  Though, I did see a number of Amish in horse carts, ate some chocolate, and traveled down the first concrete mile in New Jersey (exciting, I know!).  But, I'm back and sorted, and the whole mini wild ass plan will soon be detailed. 

That's just silly.

Vera Bradley hell.