Last night was my last city shift and last clinical of the semester. Yay! Our first and only interesting call was for an overdose. The patient was on an MTA bus. She was sitting up, conked out with sporadic snoring respirations. I started the IV (my fastest yet!) and drew up the Narcan. I gave it to her and about a minute later she woke up, good as new, until about a minute after that, she started puking everywhere. Now, everyone that knows me knows that I have strict rules about vomiting. I have my ‘no puke zones’ which basically include every area within, let’s say, a 50 yard radius of me. I just hate it. Well, who doesn’t really? If somebody’s throwing up, no one says: “Ooh, where! Let me see!”
So, we’re in pretty close quarters with this patient as she was puking all over. Then suddenly I thought: “Hey, I’m okay. I feel fine!” I was so proud of my tummy for not letting me down in this most gross situation; no queasiness here!
We finally got rid of her (just one of those patients) when I began to wonder how she even made her way onto the bus in the first place. Then I wondered why she got on the bus. But, I figured that one out. The MTA is the place to be! It’s a party every day on those busses. Have you seen them? All blue inside with the strobe lights, smoke machines, and mirror balls. Who wouldn’t want to get high and hang out there? It should be their motto: “The fun never stops on MTA” “Always a party on MTA.” I foresee a whole new ad campaign, public transit in the city will never be the same (well, after they get the vomit cleaned up).
I’m pretty happy that I got to experience this “classic” Baltimorean call.
I also came full circle with my area. My first patient in the city was also my second to last (see Snow, combs, forks, and bananas.) She was the conveniently accessorized patient. She was not so enhanced this time; what will she do if she needs to comb her hair? Just suffer like the rest of us inefficient people, I guess. She again had no chief complaint, but she must really like the inside of Baltimore hospitals. Personally, I can’t get enough of them, so I’m pretty jealous that she’s in them 3,4, maybe even 5 times a week, lucky!
I'll be back in the city next year. Exciting things are developing that I'll have to detail later (when it's all official). Time now to go visit the fam for a little while.