I am from

I am from a regular town full of regular people.
People satisfied with purely living life.
Sometimes I yearn for such simple desires
as a two car garage, a dog, a big television.

I am not special, yet feel unfulfilled.
I’m a wannabe gypsy, a transient
who fears the permanence of real life;
of matrimony, contracts, escrow.

But I have roots.
Roots that are deep and don’t want to be exposed.
Covered in the dirt of childhood,
of old friends, of young and aging family members alike.
I cannot just shake them off
and plant somewhere new.

I fear looking back with disappointment,
but it spares my tail from being between my legs again.
Still I search for the courage. A matter of
closed eyes, trust games, and gambles.

I take stock of where I’m from
knowing I will inevitably leave again.
Though I am inexorably tied
to its people, its weather, its street names.


But when I leave,
I learn that where I’m from
is where everyone else is from too.

Comments

Sarah A. said…
Hi Ellie!
This entry touched me, as I feel I'm in a similar position of life as you. I'm 27, share your gypsy dreams and am also closely tied to my family and home. I travel constantly, unable to quench my desires to see the world. I don't know where I will end up, who I will end up with; but I know that when I return home to visit (or even stay for a bit), it's like crawling back into bed with my teddy like I did as a little girl...comforting. Also, like you, I have my EMT license so I feel as though I can relate to that part of your life as well! Cheers and take life like a bull by the horns - follow your gypsy passions and see the world...I fear you will turn back and be disappointed if you don't.

:) S.
http://bonojos.blogspot.com/

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