A Work in Progress

I must have let it be known in the previous six years of the blog that I mostly hate summer.  Almost exclusively because it's hot.  Secondly because there are school age kids in public in the middle of the day in the middle of the week.  But mostly it's the heat. A couple of weeks ago I got a hair cut (well, all of them, budum, chee!) mostly because the summer is hot and I hate it and the long hair really gets annoying.  But my hair is now just a little too short to pull back and must nearly constantly be beaten into submission and forced behind my ears.  This is fine unless I'm doing, well, anything. Last week at work I ran a cardiac arrest and I found myself poised with a laryngoscope and taking a time out to pointedly put my hair behind each ear.  It took about 20 seconds for my hair to wriggle out and then be perpetually in my face because I didn't want to touch it with my dirty gloves.  That, plus the heat of the day was causing me to sweat in a...

I press my fingers into the bruise on the back of my right hand. It does not hurt enough. It does not take their pain away, It does not save him. Hand on top of hand, I did my best to pump his dying heart back to life. Never wishing so fervently for a patient to open his eyes and smile at us as we congratulate ourselves. A slow leak in the brain has left her a widow with only one month in. Does he have to die, to remind us to live? All of our tools could not compete. Could not reverse the damage. Still I plead with his heart. Just start again and we’ll give you what you want. I press my fingers into the bruise on the back of my right hand. It does not hurt enough. It does not take their pain away, It does not save him.

They had picked up a patient at the nursing home and were coming down the hallway with him on the cot. Ahead, two women were side by side shuffling down the hall in their wheelchairs. “Ooh, it's a race!” she exclaimed as they approached, pointing at the lined up wheelchairs. Her partner laughed "Who's gonna win?" They stopped the stretcher behind them and she walked up and squeezed the shoulder of one on them. “Do you mind if I push you along a bit, dear. We just have to get by.” The wheelchair bound woman agreed and picked up her feet. The EMT pushed her up and left her six feet in front of the other woman so that they could get the stretcher by. As they passed, she pointing behind her with her thumb and, shaking her head with genuine concern said, “The other lady will never make up that time.”

Before we headed north, C suggested that we backpack one night and then hike in the high peaks the next day on a trail to "Avalanche Pass." To be honest, from the start I was not in love with the idea, and the addition of the word avalanche to our marathon of hiking didn't really sweeten the deal. But, despite a questionable weather report and a significant drop in temperature from 60 miles east, we headed into the woods from Adorandack HQ. Though I had a 'tude on from the start, it was really good hiking. The trail was interesting and variable and there were no bugs! It was sprinkling rain throughout and the wind was cutting, but that really only made things better in a weird way. Until we stopped for lunch and nearly froze to death. We didn't do the whole hike to avoid walking along some exposed areas (didn't really want to brave the wind) but did make it to avalance lake which was beautiful. The trail got incredibly silly, comprised at some point m...

Last week we headed to upstate New York, starting at Niagara Falls, which really wasn't NY at all. I'm happy to report that it only took me seven months to get back out of the country, even if it was only for a few hours. I hadn't been to Niagara since I was about 4 or 5 when I refused to get on the maid of the mist. And then, once convinced to get on, refused to get off. Man that was awesome. This time, we did the behind the falls tour on the Canadian side. Someone thought it would be a good idea to build a tunnel behind the falls which is actually pretty cool as you are literally behind the falls. The view was um, watery. We then visited illustrious Watertown, NY, a veritable hotbed of activity. If you count the production of car freshening trees and memorial day BBQs. From there we headed into the mountains and hiked and camped for three days. The first day we left from a little town called Wanakena. It was warm, but the sun was baking the piney smell right ...

Last week, my grandmother turned 95.  For the last few years I have had a work in progress poem, progressively titled 'When I'm 92...93...94' and this year, I finally settled on the lines. Happy Birthday Grandmom, I'm sure Mom will print this out for you. When I'm 95, I want to be like you. I want to be alive! I want independence, children whose successes outweigh mine, and grandchildren I can sip whisky with. When I'm 95, I want to be like you. I want to be a good storyteller. But really I would settle for the stories. They are what define you. The one of bread handed over a fence, a proud little red wagon, or how a pair of pants set you free. Or how you picked up coal from the train tracks, your adventures at the cannery, and how much you loved selling stationary at the five and dime. When I'm 95, I want to be like you. I want to have found love. I want to have given all of mine and have it be enough. I want to know the secret of a long ...

A stream in the Adirondacks.

The very astute blog reader would point out now that I have skipped two days of the photo a day project this year.  But, realizing this, I decided to do like Ramadan (not to compare the importance of Ramadan with that of posting a picture a day), but if you miss a day of fasting, you can just tack one onto the end.  Which means, a 'bonus' photo a day for June 1 and 2!  Luckily, I was doing something photogenic.  So, here's a fern.  I know, exciting!